The guy who drink coffee while chomping biscuit:
The Bad, The Evil and The Worse
Arc 1 The Beginnings of Evil
Chapter 1 An Unnecessary Tutorial and A New Friend
[Please select your name.]
In this dark and infinite shadow that surrounded him, someone heard a monotone and mechanical voice.
[Please select your name.]
The voice repeated itself, the individual who floated alone in the void knew that if he said nothing the voice would repeat itself as it had for the past 100 times. He would respond, but he was still pondering what he should call himself.
[Please select your name.]
Every 15 seconds the voice would repeat itself, much to the irritation of the person in the void.
[Are you sure that you wish to select this name?]
“Yes.” (Jason Schwartz)
[Understood. Your name is Jason Schwartz.]
Jason Schwartz (Let’s call him Schwartz from now on) was optimistic, maybe now the voice would shut…
[Are you a Male or a Female?]
[Select your species. Human, Beastman, Lizardman, Elf, Dwarf or Demon.]
“Question, what kind of world will I end up on?” (Schwartz)
[A Goldilocks Planet with various biome types.]
“What is the planet’s name?” (Schwartz)
“What are the sentient races on this planet?” (Schwartz)
[All of those previously listed.]
“Then I pick the one with the most influence and authority.” (Schwartz)
[Understood, you will be given a Male Human body. Thank you for participating in this experiment, your stating position will be randomly set. As thanks for participating in this experiment, you will be given certain abilities. Thank you, and have a nice, peaceful and morally noble life!]
Immediately after Schwartz left the void, alarmed mechanical voices began to ring out.
[ERROR! ERROR! ERROR! ERROR! REINCARNATION SYSTEM HAS ENCOUNTERD TERMINAL ERROR!]
[INDIVIDUAL JASON SCHWARTZ HAS BEEN SENT TO THE WRONG UNIVERSE!]
[INDIVIDUAL, JASON SCHWARTZ HAS BEEN REINCARNATED FULLY GROWN!]
[INDIVIDUAL JASON SCHWARTZ HAS BEEN GIVEN TOO MANY ABILITIES!]
[INDIVIDUAL JASON SCHWARTZ HAS ACCIDENTALY BEEN GIVEN LIMITED INVINCIBLITY AND PERPETUAL YOUTH!]
[INDIVIDUAL JASON SCHWARTZ HAS BEEN SENT TO UNIVERSE PA-E12-CE2250 INSTEAD OF UNIVERSE HF-E31-CE1000!]
[INDIVIDUAL JASON SCHWARTZ’ STATS HAVE BEEN CORRUPTED!]
[INDIVIDUAL JASON SCHWARTZ’ RACE SETTINGS HAVE BEEN CORRUPTED!]
[INDIVIDUAL JASON SCHWARTZ’MORALITY SETTINGS HAVE BEEN CORRUPTED!]
[UNIVERSE PA-E12-CE2250’S DATA HAS BEEN CORRUPTED BY DATA FROM OTHER UNIVERSES!]
[TOTAL SYSTEM FAILURE IMMENENT! ATTEMPTING TO PURGECREATION OF UNIVERSE PA-E12-CE2250 AND INDIVIDUAL JASON SCHWARTZ.]
[ERROR! ISOLATING UNIVERSE PA-E12-CE2250 FROM CREATION]
[PURGE UNSUCCESFUL, HOWEVER ISOLATION HAS BEEN SUCCESFUL. TOTAL SYSTEM FAILURE AVERTED.]
Schwartz found himself high above a vast continental planet. From high up in space he could see this world had continents that looked somewhat familiar, though he could not remember where he had seen them or if he had seen them at all.However, what surprised Eden the most was that the ground was not rushing towards him, rather he seemed to be hovering several thousand miles above the surface. Slowly, he began to descent. It was at a good pace, he guessed it to be roughly 4 miles per hour. Time passed slowly as he descended through the atmosphere, the clouds and into the center of an area that was covered in the ruins of massive metal, glass and concrete structures that towered in the air.
“Hmm. I don’t think this is where I was supposed to be dropped off. I could have sworn that voice said I would be reincarnated and doesn’t reincarnation mean I would be born again as a child? Something fishy is going on here...” Schwartz thought as he landed softly on the top of a tower, sticking a perfect 10-point landing.
“Congratulations for reaching the age of 5! It is now time to start your tutorial! Please say [STAUS OPEN] to review your status!”
A new voice was heard, an entirely new one that seemed to be much less mechanical than the voice that he had heard in the Void. Schwartz assumed this new voice was the voice of the tutorial.
“Status open.” Schwartz said.
“You’ve got to mean it! Will it to be! Say [STATUS OPEN] with determined intent!” (Tutorial)
“Fine! [STATUS OPEN]!” (Schwartz)
This time a semi-transparent screen appeared in front of him. It displayed his name, his race, his “level”, his abilities and his stats. Looking closely, Schwartz saw that his stats were absurdly high. The lowest stat he had was [AGILITY] and that alone was 100. He also saw he had many abilities that were locked for some reason.
His information read as follows;
NAME: Jason Schwartz
RACE: Humanity Perfected
STRENGTH (Str.) : 500
PERCEPTION (Pr.) : 150
ENDURANCE (Endr.) : 1000
CHARISMA (Char.) : 550
INTELLIGENCE (Int.) : 300
AGILITY (Ag) : 100
LUCK (Lk.) : 2500
ABILITIES: [No-Reload] [Endless Magazine] [Developer Console] [Unbreakable Will] [Neo Reflexes] [Apocalyptic Feng-Shui] [Unlimited Resources] [Immortal] [Eternally Young] [Invincible] [Tactical Genius] [ Perfect Firearm Mastery] [Perfect Heavy Weapon Mastery] [Perfect Explosives Mastery] [Power of Domination] [Hammer-Space] [Unbreakable Possessions] [Perfect All Language Comprehension] etc.…
The list went on and on. As Schwartz scrolled though his large amount of abilities, one caught his attention. It was called [Settlement Builder Ultra]. He was instinctively aware of what each of his abilities could do and the heightened Int. that he possessed immediately saw the potential of such an ability. Before he could formulate a plan, he was interrupted by the Tutorial.
“Now that you have an idea of your Abilities, let’s try one out. Please select an Ability to test!” (Tutorial)
“Easy. I choose [Settlement Builder Ultra]!” (Schwartz)
“Understood. Please activate [Settlement Builder Ultra] and we will continue.” (Tutorial)
“[SETTLEMENT BUILDER ULTRA]!” Schwartz thought with the same intent he had when opening his Status Menu.
Suddenly, the whole world seemed to freeze for a few seconds. After the freeze, Schwartz saw that a massive wall of green light which dictated the limits of where he could build had materialized around the ruined city he was in. The light was about a kilometer from the edge of the city and went up higher than he was despite him being on the tallest remaining structure in the city ruins which stood over 100 stories tall.
“Now that you have activated [Settlement Builder Ultra], please…” (Tutorial)
Schwartz interrupted the voice, saying with intent, “Tilde. Disable Tutorial. Enter. Tilde.”
And just like that, the voice disappeared. Schwartz smiled a malicious smile and gazed over the entire city. He was well aware that there was still life living in this city, mind you there was no intelligent life, but there was life nonetheless. He giggled and as he jumped off his perch said in a clear distinct voice, “Tilde. Scrap all. Enter. Tilde.”
By the time he landed on the asphalt below, the entire city had disappeared save for various animals which were either dead from the drop, crushed by the falling animals or were in a state of confusion as to what had happened. Once again a malicious grin appeared on Schwartz’ face and he yelled to the confused animals, “It’s Slaughterin’ Time!”
Schwartz rushed the nearest living animal, a large green man in scrap metal armor wielding a metal, spiked baseball bat covered in razor-wire like it was a police baton. Before the creature could react, the arm carrying the bat was missing from its shoulder and Schwartz had already torn the bat from the severed arm and had smashed the brains out of 20 other giant green men. Wielding the bat in his right hand and a .50 Caliber Revolver in his left, Schwartz cut a bloody swath through the creatures in his build area. As the last corpse dropped to the ground, Schwartz looked to the sky and let out a bone-chilling laugh. He was covered in the blood of all the things he had killed, unlocked a plethora of new Abilities and had gained over 49 levels in under 30 minutes.
Yes, he had killed every medium and large creature in the entire build area and all in under 30 minutes. He had butchered desiccated husks of former humans, giant green men, giant insects and arachnids, gigantic mutant dogs and rats and even a whole colony of giant bipedal horned lizard-like creatures. He felt great, but knew it would be a hassle and a half to dispose of the bodies by himself… Unless…
“Tilde. Scrap all. Enter. Tilde.” (Schwartz)
The corpses of his prey disappeared in an instant. All the blood and bile, all the armor and weapons, all the meat and bone and chitin, all gone. No, it wasn’t gone. It was disassembled and stored in his [Hammer-Space] for him to withdraw whenever he chose to do so.
As the adrenalin wore off, Schwartz noticed that there was something off. Despite leaving the birds, rats and other small critters alive there was an eerie silence that hung over the area. Then, he felt a massive bloodlust coming from underneath him. He was sure that he had cleaned out the sewers and subway system totally and thoroughly, but he was wrong. Something powerful had survived, perhaps due to being in a deep hibernation and only awoken by the ocean of blood he had spilled. Schwartz braced himself as the ground directly in front of him burst open and a giant lizard-like creature tore its way out of the subway and through the asphalt.
This creature was defiantly a mutant of its kind. The colony of creatures like it he had slaughtered were at most only half its size, and this one had glowing white cracks running through its body. The beast roared and as Schwartz used his [Observe] skill he learned what this creature was. It was an [Ancient Legendary Deathclaw Matron Alpha] but that was too long of a name, so Schwartz used his [Developer Console] to re-name it as [Big Momma]. As Schwartz prepared to tear the [Big Momma] to bits when a thought crossed his mind. Flashing a rotten grin, he used [Power of Domination] of the [Big Momma].
Seconds passed, then minutes as the two lethal monsters stared each other down. What irritated Schwartz the most was that he had no way of knowing when the [Power of Domination] would take effect or if it had done so already.
Slowly, the [Big Momma] approached him and lowered its head to him as if it was asking to be held. Schwartz cautiously reached out and rubbed the monster under its chin, which elicited a deep, guttural purring sound from the monster.
“You are mine now. Don’t ever forget it. You belong solely to me and if someone threatens me, you must destroy them. Likewise, if someone threatens you, I will destroy them. From today onwards, you will serve me and in exchange I will provide you with a home, food, water and anything else you might need. I am Jason Schwartz and I am your master, now and forever.” (Schwartz)
The great Deathclaw got on all four limbs as if it was bowing to him, then got up on its hind legs and let out a massive roar as if to celebrate that it had a new purpose for existing.
“Now… I just need a name for you…” Schwartz thought to himself.
Author’s Note: Hello, everyone! I will be writing both “Undeath and Taxes” as well as “The Bad, The Evil and The Worse”. I apologize if I can’t get a chapter out a week, but writing a completely original story, let alone two is difficult work. I have a full-time job and full-time college, so I write when I can. So, I will try to get out at least one chapter every 2-3 weeks and at most 2 chapters a week.
Now then, I have a question for you all. If you read to the end, Schwartz asked a question. I want you, the readers of this Chapter to give me an answer. Whatever the most people agree on will be the name of Schwartz’ new pet. If there is no consensus by the time I start writing the next chapter, I will take the name that I like the best and if you think of a name with a past, like some mythical monster, then even better. Just, please no silly names like Bobo, Cuddles, McGuffin or Mary Sue. Thank you all for reading!
P.S. Can you figure out the naming convention for Universes in this Chapter?